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Addiction: Tough Love Or Tough Luck? Empathy Works Better
- By Maia Szalavitz
- Published 02/19/2010
- Help Another with their Addiction
- Unrated
One of the main reasons I wanted to write about empathy in my
forthcoming book with Bruce Perry, MD, Phd, Born for Love, was my
experience of the lack of empathy we show towards people with
addiction. As a former heroin and cocaine addict, I was horrified by
what I learned about treatment before I sought help: the idea was that
addiction is cured by "tough love," by breaking people in order to fix
them.
Pain and anger are the hidden burden for children with an alcoholic parent
- By News Services
- Published 02/15/2010
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- Unrated
Her father was an alcoholic who drank himself to death. All the help
his young daughters and his wife tried to get him, from detox
programmes, to rehab, to psychiatric sessions, had failed. "He chose to
drink, and he chose that over us. It took me a long, long time to
accept he had a disease, but my anger had gone before he died." Smith,
now 27, spent her late teenage years trying to protect her younger
sisters, support her mother and get help for her father. There was
little time for her to enjoy her youth.
When It Comes To Recovery, Are Your Expectations Dangerous?
- By Carole Bennett
- Published 02/5/2010
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- Unrated
We have heard sayings like "don't get your expectations too high, or
curb your expectations." Try as you might, you can't help but to dream,
plot or plan out calculated moves in order for your expectations to
come to fruition. You have a tough enough time trying to control your
expectations in regards to your own personal life, but pinning those
invisible and emotional expectations on the alcoholic/addict and their
recovery is more often than not doomed for failure.
Al-Anon 12-Step Recovery Program: Love It Or Leave It
- By Carole Bennett
- Published 01/27/2010
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- Unrated
For those who don't know or have never heard of Al-anon, it is a
12-step recovery program that is the counter-part to the Alcoholics
Anonymous 12-step recovery program. It was initiated by Lois Wilson
(the wife of Bill Wilson; one of the original founders of Alcoholics
Anonymous) as a safe haven and support group for anyone who is dealing
with a loved one's alcoholism (and/or drug addiction). I have been
attending Al-anon meetings for 20 years and came away from my first
meeting thinking..."What a bunch of losers, as well as... I heard some
interesting things here."
Addiction: Holidays Are A Time To Secure Boundaries
- By Carole Bennett
- Published 11/18/2009
- Help Another with their Addiction
- Unrated
During this time of year, I have had many clients look for guidance on
how to establish and secure their boundaries with the alcoholic/addict
whether it is a spouse, child or friend. They want to include them in
the family festivities, but are anxious nonetheless; torn between the
pull of family unity and the possibility of uncertain behavior. They
have witnessed all too often the other occasions like birthdays,
anniversaries or just plain Sunday night dinners when the
alcoholic/addict arrived in their addiction, or became intoxicated and
all hell broke lose due to... well, anything.
Friends, family, colleagues must find the courage to hold addicts accountable
- By Misc Author
- Published 11/11/2009
- Help Another with their Addiction
- Unrated
Having the courage to hold people accountable - especially the ones we
love - for their substance abuse is the single most important community
factor in reversing addictive behavior. Denial and the lack of courage to hold the addict accountable lets the
disease process go forward, ruining the user’s life and those around
them.
Narcissism In A Bottle: The Self-Centeredness Of Addiction
- By Tian Dayton
- Published 08/4/2009
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- Unrated
A
narcissist often prefers to have people around him who behave in such a
way as to meet and gratify his own needs or enhance his own vision of
himself. If they act separately, have too many of their own points of
view or their own opinions they threaten the narcissist's equilibrium. How
does this mirror addiction? The addict is ever absorbed with getting
their next fix; that's how they maintain their equilibrium, albeit very
dysfunctionally. Their needs come first.
Is It OK to Harass the Smokers We Love?
- By Misc Author
- Published 09/25/2008
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Living with an alcoholic
- By John McMahon
- Published 07/11/2008
- Help Another with their Addiction
- Unrated
One of the commonest questions anyone working in the addiction field is
asked is “How can I stop my wife/husband/partner from drinking so
much?” Unfortunately the short answer to that is – you can’t. They will
stop when it suits them, whether that is because they hurt so much or
because circumstances change. There is some good news, however, and that is if you can’t actually
stop them drinking then there are things that you can do, or stop
doing, that will make it more likely that they will take action and/or
seek help for their drinking.
Adultolescence: Men Who Won't Grow Up
- By Christine Hassler
- Published 07/8/2008
- Help Another with their Addiction , Life Management Skills
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Dear Bewildered Best Friend -- Sounds like your friend has a severe case of "adult-olescence;" his
mindset is far below his numeric age and he continues to play at being
an adolescent when he's really an adult. I often refer to it as the
"Peter Pan Syndrome." It can be a form of escapism, denial, and delayed adulthood, and it's
accomplished by a lot of play, feelings of invincibility, and
self-obsession.

Help Another with their Addiction


